Thursday, 6 April 2017

Dear Death

Dear Death, where art thou?
Take me to you,
Let me lay my head upon your lap
For I am weary.

Dear Death, where art thou?
The blush of my life is faded
The flower, it blooms no more
For I am poisoned.

Dear Death, where art thou?
My body aches with pain
And my limbs have lost their sync
For my being is everything but dead.

Dear Death, where art thou?
Let my age not fool you
Young I may be, but my soul
has lost its color.
Cold is the inside, thicker than ice
For every ounce of hope
has been lost.

Dear Death, where art thou?
Old friend, stop fading into the distance.
Come welcome me with open arms,
Turn my fingers icy cold
Turn my face frosty white
Turn my heart beats into silence
For it is time you and I met at last.

Dear Death, where art thou?
With a cold smile I greet thee
At the age of a mere twenty.
While my lover sleeps in peace
With love in his heart for someone but I,
I welcome you dearly
For my being is only yours, my Dear Death.

Poem by phoebeadhora

Monday, 3 April 2017

Am gay but I hate being gay...Advice

I just can’t define my sexuality. I get difficulties in choosing what part of me is really me. I use to go out with girls. I had a bunch of them priding myself but still I felt like something always missed in me. I felt incomplete and unsatisfied with my sexual personality. Men drives me crazy especially those good looking ones with eyes that make me stop doing everything. They just attracts my full attention and I find admiring them more than I do to girls. I know am gay I totally lost interest to girls but still sometime I have the funny and hot imagination on how the look when naked.

So I am gay but I hate being gay. I can’t imagine my life living with another man as my partner I find it awkward and disgusting but at the same time I want to be with them. To lay beside my boyfriend and have those magic moment. To feel his breath and morning rising up and down. To caress from top to bottom and to lick each part of him. To feel him in me and me in him.

I don’t wanna to be called somebody’s husband, just how can a man call another man a husband! I see it  as very stupid and unworthy but still I want him to call me ‘baby’. To say I love you, to be by your side forever. I want him each and every time. I want him to lay his head over my chest watching that TV series while on the bed. To feel him sleep and take that sweet breath of him in me. want to have children but a man can’t bare me children, but still I want him to be there with me as I raise them, to care for them as I do to him. The kids to grow up and call him daddy therefore we’re two daddies, what a challenge?

But of course am Damn Liam, just an African young fella who hasn’t find someone to love. Just a silly young guy who still can’t define what he wants. Please don’t judge all I know is that am gay and am proud to be what I am.

How I came out of the closet to my friend David

Am African boy and 28 year old, for the past eight years life hasn’t been fare to me. Living with myself has been the most challenging aspect of my life. I first discovered that am not into girls like five years ago of course that’s according to the way we African live, discovering yourself takes a little bit of time not only in sexuality point of view but almost to everything we may want to become-with that I mean choosing a career of choice and so on.

In 2015 I met a friend, his name is David. We worked in the same electrical engineering project but different companies. We quickly became good friends from the first time we met. I kind of had crush on him since he was the most good looking young fella-I may add that was one the reasons why I kept around lol. He is a year younger than me- and that’s was the fine age with me. We used to hangout much often until that time when the project ended and move to another city.

The funny thing with David was that he had this amazing thing of being an open minded guy. He talks about each and everything. I loved that but still to me I couldn’t tell him what I hide under my smile given the chance that he was an understanding person. Although he is a womanizer, he always tells me how he met some dudes and always have crush and also approach him at some point. Sad thing he always turn them down.

A few days ago called him with intention of confessing my identity—yes indeed I did tell him there is there is something want to tell him and I feel bad awkward about it. As funny as he always be, he just ran into comments and said ‘don’t tell me you fucked a guy’. I stopped taking because he just struck the point out of me. I didn’t tell him though what I wanted to say instead I mentioned to him that I will be traveling back to town and I will confess.

It’s Sunday morning I woke up a bit early to go and visit David. He just lives some 25 minutes aways from my place. 
I met David at his place, he was busy playing grand theft auto 5. I didn’t want to waste much time as I immediately ask him if we could talk. 
‘ Dave can you describe me-I mean my sexual personality’ I asked him. He was kind os surprised by the question and starting laughing at me. I could wait for him to answer back and just went straight ahead a told him ‘Am gay’. Immediately I felt like my brain went black and I could talk anymore. I just confessed to him that am gay and I could see any reaction on his face. 

Do you want me to continue….

Friday, 31 March 2017

My Saturdays in the Seventies

My Saturdays in the Seventies

My Saturdays in the Seventies

The banana splits and hair bear bunch
Johnny Quest and Pufnstuf

Snagglepuss, daffy duck
The three stooges Nyuk, Nyuk, Nyuk

Foghorn leghorn, Sylvester the cat
Yosemite Sam and his ten gallon hat

Penelope Pitstop, Dastardly Dan
Hong Kong Fooey was the man

Auggie doggy, Tom and Jerry
Yogi bear, Bert and Ernie

Gomer Pyle and Shazam
Ginger or Mary Ann

Miss Piggy, Kermit the frog
The Flintstones and Underdog

Looney toons, merry melodies
Was my Saturday in the seventies

By Jimmydon

Tuesday, 28 March 2017

Growing up gay.

Growing up gay wasn't easy.
Always knowing I was different to the rest.
I never felt right, never felt normal.
Because I'm not.
I'm different.
But sometimes difference is good, isn't it?
I've accepted myself.
But some haven't.

I got inspired by:amb
Coming out wasn’t easy. I grew up in private school so I didn’t even know what gay was until I was 11 or 12, thank you Ellen DeGeneres. Thought was ‘Oh, so that’s what I am…well I must be going to hell.’ That was one of the hardest parts. Figuring out how to keep faith and come out when all I was being told at school is that gay people go to hell. I lost my faith during this time. Not because I was gay but because I was 13, angry, and an outcast. Add to that I was going through “changes” in my body and mental process, so coming out was a bit chaotic. Come to find out my family always knew, for the most part. It was no big shocker, but saying the words were hard.

I remember the first time I told someone I was gay. It was one of my friends growing up. I told her and she kind of said ok that is fine no problem. I thought, ‘well that was easy’ then went in to tell my best friend. That did not go well. That’s one of those moments I will never forget. Standing on the second floor balcony between classes, I asked her if she had a second. I told her I’m pretty sure that I’m gay (I was more than pretty sure, but pretty sure was to lighten the load, as if it could be). She said ok then turned and walked away. That was the moment I lost my best friend. I wasn’t asking anything of her. I told her for me. For no one else but me. I knew that her faith clouded her view. There’s no fault there. I admire her faith and I’m sure her decision to lose me as a friend wasn’t easy. But I wont complain about it. It shaped who I am today. Like I tell my nephew, the only whine we like comes out of a bottle so take what you’re given and grow from experience. I lost faith and motivation during this time. I was an outcast at my school and was very unhappy. The friends that I had were my sisters and they accepted me. They loved me who I was, Lindsay’s little sister. My mom and dad saw that I was unhappy in private school. So when I asked to go to public school, they agreed that public school, while not a very good option for my older sister, would probably be good for me. Continue>>>>

Gay Christian

Gay Christian

I'm done repressing my gayness
Because it's the "Christian" thing to do.
I will wear rainbow nipple pasties
And march in a pride parade
If I please
And then go to church and praise Jesus
And God and the Holy Spirit
For making the way I am
And how I am
Because he made me perfect.
I am gay
I am Christian
I am proud to be both.

Friday, 24 February 2017

Black Rose and White Rose

My friend, the best friend I know
The black rose in the forest, have you seen it?
Lonely and no one cares for it
Along it grows among the bushy trees
Healthy as it looks, it glows like the only star in the sky
Although dull it looks to him shiny it appears

Back to the forest again
The young tree falls from the sky
Before that I saw a bird flew without flapping its
Wings?-was it an eagle that crossed the sky
The white tree was from the eagle
But the tree was bright coloured, that white rose
Shone the forest to the fullest.

Just to the next black the white fell
Glimmering and admiring the black it felt
With passion and elegancy the pride was theirs
Understanding each other was the hope
The white rose shone like the Babylon angels
Their wings filled, filled what?
The sky was filled with sensation of love
From down it grew faster, faster like it felt the love for it;

Yes it was powers of unknown that bind them
The relation grew fast
Flapping their petals in the wind was the game
The game they played all day
Like moon in the sky, the white glows to the black
The black rose admired the white rose
The white rose admired the black
But it’s in the air they met
Through the wireless they talked
Never knowing one another there they went
Love begins; the white rose took black out

In the dark, the whispered telling each other the story
Story to reveal their secrets, secret for life they told
Understanding each other grew the intention
White rose couldn’t reveal to black rose
Neither could black rose say to the white
The son of man had found the son of man
Together they opt to live happy lives with no ending
Yes the white matches the black,
Together they become beauty.

Long after waiting for an answer
There they go now, love is all they need
Love no boundaries encounters
Black and white together, colour matters no more
With love and unity they grew in one a cord

With unheard communication in the air
They knew each from the root
Roots that grew into trunk and into leaves was final
No one could understand what they are
They only flapped their petals in the air
And kisses was all that awaited
Love was for the black and white roses.

Allow me,

I can see tears dropping from your eyes
Down your soft lumpy cheeks they flow
You say you’re fine but a lie it is
I knock, knock, knock but your heart is closed
Please let me in to relieve the pain in you

I see the thorn that is in your side
You’re so tone and drowned by the side
And gong’ gong’ I call and shout
But you say you okay and shut me out

Every day I stand walk down the street in town
As you pass I smile and you return a frown
I promise you can be happy without that folk
Reasons why I stand, look, wait and knock

I write this poem straight from my soul
To say I love you and that is all
For not the last I knock
Waiting you open for me the only me that can make
You happier

Happier like angels in the sky they sing hallelujah
To bless us and blessing is all we need
Please let me come in to sooth you
I carry white roses on my right hand
The only one love I bring to you
On the left hand I carry the white feathery and thick coat
Just to keep you warm in this winter.